Youre always stressed and always tired. To which I reply, We didnt end up going, though. Oh, 15,000 miles. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Why is it every time the collateral damage has to be death, for us to talk about this? Nothing. Bethany, Ive got a gig in New York next week. And now Mrs Reeds like, Hey, honey, we know so much about Bethany, but we dont know anything about you. Directed by: Christopher Storer I love you. Drives off into the night. Its a big deal. I just think our fathers didnt download all the great dad software. This is really nice. And I look at her, and Im like, Oh, my God. Boom. He goes, Hasan, Im mad at you. I know, I kissed a girl. Never did that. We decide to move in together. Be proud. And youre really special to me. Then the following Monday, during first period she finds me. Address. How many times do we complain about racism in our community? Hey, man, where are you going? And its Jon. I need the claps. Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 2017 | Maturity Rating: TV-MA | 1h 12m | Comedies Comic Hasan Minhaj of "The Daily Show" shares personal stories about racism, immigrant parents, prom night horrors and more in this stand-up special. These kids know where we live, theyre timing this, so theyre watching us. Youll need them later. Like, I had vision as a six-year-old. No, no were not. I look at her, Please dont say anything. She says nothing, like a G. [laughter] Bell rings. So Im walking back to the Camry, then I hear a voice behind me. So I started doing comedy. He served as an associate producer for the Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King special, released on Netflix in May 2017. This is a real show about a white kid that gets slapped at a birthday party. Hey, audition for The Daily Show. I submit a tape. I think about it all the time. Verified reviews are considered more trustworthy by fellow moviegoers. So when 9-11 happened I was in high school. Arden. Im looking at my dad and I see all five-seven of him. Its hard when you see people saying they love you but theyre afraid at the same time. I was like, Are we getting married? I crushed it like a Voldemort Horcrux. I couldnt believe it. Second marriage, Tools, Clear History. You guys decided to get your Angelina Jolie on, and bring over this FOB. I cant date your daughter. I dont give a fuck, Uncle Sam. ' I ran home, I was like, Dad, I would like to go to prom. [speaking Hindi] Which means, I will break your face. Duly noted, father. Bethany, situation at home. 2:27. We used to have landlines. Hes like, Thats a good point. Shes like, Hey. Its like the adults in Charlie Br0wn. So I was wondering, will you go to prom with me?, I was like, Yes, my white princess. As soon as I said that, I was like, No! I had bitten off more than I could chew. Did you forget? Hes like, Hasan, how could I forget that its your birthday? How is this possible? LA, Chicago, New York? I was like, Nah, son. I call my girl. Like a fucking G! Mr Reed can give you a ride home. And I was like, No, I have my bike. And I just biked home and played Mario Kart. It is amazing. Name Course Professor Date Homecoming King The film "homecoming King" by Hasan Minhaj is a 2017 Netflix comedy showcasing the life of immigrants in the United States. camasunary fishing lodge; crookston, mn obituaries You werent the same for me, fine. Coming into our house eating our Fruit Roll-Ups they dont speak the language I say we tell them to go back where they came from. Hes like, You cant say that. That is an Indian sociopath. Why didnt you forgive her? he asks his son. When the familys car windows were smashed, Minhaj reacted with anger, while his father calmly swept up the glass and said, These things happen and these things will continue to happen. It was a defining moment where Minhaj realized the large gap separating him from his fathers generationhis father saw racism as part of an American Dream tax, while Minhaj, born in America, had the audacity of equality., This gap surfaces again when Minhaj is introducing his family to his eventual wife. With topics ranging from tight rompers to ugly bras to why every man needs a box spring, Iliza remains the hilarious, affecting voice of her generation. I love you! Youre the color of poop. Thats memory number one. I get to the door, open the door, then I hear, Hey, Hasan! Shes sitting outside. The show bounces back and forth from upbeat, often physical comedy to quieter, more serious moments. Send that shit right now! Nothing! [laughter] I wish I had said, Fuck that, Im going to the dance. I didnt. Just below that it reads "Ticket Confirmation#:" followed by a 10-digit number. Her family owns a camera. My dad was like, A camera? So he runs to my grandfathers house and lays it on the line. Thats why I brought you here. Because you guys are at home, just swiping for love, and complaining. Oh, they made it! Mrs Reed opens the door. Im fucked. You look the same. So how do I explain this? Hasan, be brave. Its a very beautiful poem. Just confirm how you got your ticket. Never happened. Im balancing the corsage. Hello, who is this? Hi, its Alice. Just the two of us trying to make it in America. Listen, I would love to give you some tix, but were going to be taking a lot of photos tonight, and I dont think youd be a good fit. Send that shit! A blank stare? The image is an example of a ticket confirmation email that AMC sent you when you purchased your ticket. Put your Rajesh in my Rengatramanajananam. I was like, Stop it. I am Jon Stewart. [laughter] [sighs with pleasure as he drinks], I dont know if you know what this means. Im supposed to be her big brother, help her navigate the American dream and protect her. I cant tell him that. And then you have the audacity to be, like, Hey, why are you so melodramatic? Because I went to war for you. I got a ring and then lost my powers, which is a very different Lord of the Rings. [theme music: orchestral hip-hop] [crowd roars] What's up? I have a personality. Where do you think you got that from, dummy? Thats you. So make up your mind. August 11th, 1993. But I was like, No, shes different. I hit her up late at night. But, you know, if life gives you lemons, sometimes youve got to make revenge lemonade. Sprinkle in a little irony. #brilliant. You should follow your dreams. [laughter] Maybe I will. I was like, Why? You know when I emigrated to this country in 1982, I thought if I let you go to a school dance, you would join a gang, get a girl pregnant and become a drug dealer, in one night. Sweetie, we love you, we think youre great. Life is tough and sometimes you dont know what youre doing. Get nine in a box for just ten bucks. You choked, right? Thank you for the opportunity. I tucked that turtle head back in my butt. No, wait. I didnt. When you see someone from your past, all of a sudden, youre that age again. Made for a better tweet though. Good night. Cloth interior for life. All men created equal. It says it right here, Im equal. And I dont know why I get to Kaiser and run upstairs. You shouldnt relax. And I can feel it. Muslims are like, No statues! I got a career I hate from my parents. Its a lie. "Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King," Mr. Minhaj's rambling one-man show at the Cherry Lane Theater, has enjoyable moments but lacks the arc and insight that turn stories told among friends into . So Hindus Hindus dont eat beef. In his 2017 stand-up special, Minhaj introduced himself and his . Whatever. Thats Tinder with no photos. Im not Larry David. Dont worry, it wont take long. Why? Im like, Dude, what are you doing? Me, Jehovahs Witness girl, Korean exchange students, going to the prom? Elder siblings, we walk through the world like, Do people love me? And youre like, Mom and Dad fucked up with you, not with me. [shocked laughter] Shes like, Take it for one lap around the block. [speaking Hindi] I grab those handlebars, Im like, Fuck that noise. Boom. Married. Dad goes, Put on Indian clothes. Im like, Alright. My dads from that generation where he feels like if you come to this country, you pay the American dream tax. I run to the club, jump on stage I dont even know what I said. My dad sits everybody down. Fuck. The dream is for you to take, so take that shit. Raj is a good person and so am I. But we had those first secrets. Why do you do that? And she was like, I am so sorry. You know, I kept doing comedy. I had to bring it back here. When is she coming back? Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King, is the theatrical debut of humorist and "The Daily Show" correspondent Hasan Minhaj. By opting to have your ticket verified for this movie, you are allowing us to check the email address associated with your Rotten Tomatoes account against an email address associated with a Fandango ticket purchase for the same movie. You know what the shitty part is? Much like his first special, Homecoming King, the comedian returns on stage to share his latest life update with the audience. I should have said something. I had to bring it back here. You know about this. I dont know. And you know, time has passed, and I dont really think about that day. In that moment, I let it go. To which she replies, I know! Some of you guys are just in college, Snapchatting. I love you. And I know 9/11 is a super touchy subject. Hindus and Muslims. Youre about to go to prom with Bethany motherfucking Reed.. Were doing integrals. Jasuriah? Turn left. When is the shaadi?, Now, my AP Calc class was a group of overachievers and my Calc teacher, Mr Pendleton, wanted us to live lives outside of school. Can you write another? No, I cant. I was very emo. That was our World War I, man. He shakes my hand. I cant hear you, Dad. Now everybodys looking at me so Ive got to improvise. This is new br0wn America. Just all traps. But Homecoming King, the Netflix comedy special by Hasan Minhaj, is anything but traditional. Your boy, headlining Gotham Comedy Club. There you go, Uncle Sam. Now blood is gushing down my arm, and Im pissed, Im fucking mad. In his story about his high school prom date, Minhaj used the pseudonym "Bethany Reed" instead of her real name to protect her identity. Stop imagining her having sex with Rajesh Rengatramanajananam. Your son just won the Scripps National Spelling Bee. Racism., So Im watching the show Real Time With Bill Maher. She has a PhD. I jump off the roof. You are shitting on my dreams. I didnt say that. Reply. Hes 12 years old. Because of her, I got to marry the love of my life. You fucking dune coon. Thats a big hand. Hasan Minhaj - The Minhaj Legacy (Stand Up Comedy) comedy. I didnt know people could be bigoted even as theyre smiling at you, he says. Comic Hasan Minhaj of "The Daily Show" shares personal stories about racism, immigrant parents, prom night horrors and more in this stand-up special. Aisha goes, Come home, now. I was like, I got a set at the Comedy Store. Listen, me and my girlfriends live in Manhattan and we were wondering if we could get some tix? Question mark. No one did that. Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee: Hasan Minhaj: Nobody Cries At A Joke. My dad knows you! Hes like, Yeah, Im sure he does. I pinch myself. His story may be different than yours, but were all here together in, as Minhaj describes it, this fair and lovely world., Homecoming King Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King | Official Trailer [HD] | Netflix. Hasan Minhaj Answers Increasingly Personal Questions. Dave Chappelle talks about Kanye West, the 2022 midterm elections and Donald Trump. And, like, she learned English. Especially in middle school, if a girl called the house, you had to pick up the phone before your parents. He goes, I dont think we should do this. Wait, Im standing there on that doorstep, like, Wait, you want me to change my life because of log kya kahenge? She was turning five. Im scaling down the side of my roof, scraping my knees. You dont want to overkill it with the MJ cologne. Sitting presidents have sat on that desk. Tools, Clear History. Just saw my high school prom date in a Pizza Hut ad. #throwback. Right? So Im looking in the trees, the bushes I look back in the middle of the street, my dad is in the middle of the road sweeping glass out of the road like he works at a barbershop. Thats it. You know what I mean? Back in the day, we had to fire up the internet like goddamn cavemen. Youre not Hasan Minhaj. I was like, Yo, Facebook! 23 S.E. "The King's Jester" reps the second stand-up comedy special that Minhaj has produced and starred in. You knew it. Copyright 2023 US Catholic. Meanwhile, I I didnt go to grad school. She gets in the car. Hasan sits down with the Armchair Expert to discuss feeling overwhelmed by the balance of life and work and the effect of trends and forces in his life. They disseminate information to us. I cant do Seinfeld and Curb. But for the most part, I actually think about it the way my dad does. Homecoming King, the story of the "New Brown America," is based on true events from Minhaj's first generation Indian-American experience. Youre like, Whats the difference? [laughter] They wont get it, dude. Other days, No, fuck that. And youre like, Everybody loves me. Its such bullshit, right? Hasan Minhaj in 2016. Ill never do it again., He goes, No why dont you forgive Bethany? [speaking Hindi] He wanted to be the bigger person again. I gave you the first ride. And Im looking down at her, and Im like, Man Im being a dick. Like, this whole time I was looking for acceptance from Cody, Corey and Cole [laughter] and I had it right here this entire time. Were sitting on my living room table. Youre Hussan Minhajj. And I look over her shoulder, and I see Jeff Burke putting a corsage on Bethanys wrist. 10:19. I hear thud, thud, thud outside. So I actually have the audacity of equality. Here you go, Aisha. He looks at me. Im here to talk about prom. [laughter] And her face went white. And I wish I could tell 18-year-old me that, but I cant. [laughter] What about Mr Rengatramanajananam? Shes like, I hit it off with this guy. You make me sound like a refugee baby. Thats true. Im going to jump off and land on my bike. Her father is this successful retired judge. This is what I do. Im like, Whatever, its not going to happen. Dad, I promise you, God doesnt like bigotry. Deal with it. One of the happiest days of my life. Hasan Minhaj, 4.3 GPA, kissed a white girl. What an amazing way to go. Lets move on to Aisha., One day I get an email from my manager. I love you guys. Have fun in med school. Which is a huge lie. And he reaches in, and pulls out a beautiful, blue BMX bike. Do tell. I decided not to go. Everybody in the class looked at me. Vanity Fair. Im, like, Maybe this is bigger than me. Rajesh Rengatramanajananam, I want you so bad. Stand-up, 2022 Asian/Pacific American Heritage Month TV & Streaming Calendar. Youre a fucking idiot. And everyones like, Oh, the atheist prophet speaks! So this clip went viral, him and Ben Affleck. This is what Dad fought for. Ding-dong. I call my mom, shes crying. And I think its just that, like, immigrants love secrets. My dad wakes me up super early in the morning. But you know we were 18, right? I put on my Ghostbusters proton pack. It was like Inception. About to meet his future daughter-in-law, Minhajs father repeats an oft-spoken phrase from their household: log kya kahenge, What will people think? Minhaj and his sister become upset, believing that something bigger besides religion, race, creed, color, or class unites them with all people. People ask, Where does that come from? Look at this kids parents. Im standing there. So you could pick the door handle for the bathroom. [laughter] And I was like, Why dont you have me pick out the toilet? Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 2017 | Maturity rating: 15 | 1h 12m | Stand-up Comedy Comic Hasan Minhaj of "The Daily Show" shares personal stories about racism, immigrant parents, prom night horrors and more in this stand-up special. LA, Chicago, Nashville, New York Im flying Southwest. Is someone sitting there? She went to an Ivy League law school. Thats my bike. For years I resented that br0wn girl. Its not rubbing off! I was fucking terrified. Who was I to ruin their picture-perfect celebration? Hasan, were normal. He saw the blue BMX bike I wanted. So some of you guys dont know. Send that shit right now! And its wild that our kids will never know there was a period in time in this country where you had to make a choice between being on the internet or being on the phone. Not going to be a doctor? Were not on that stage, ever. Rated: TV-MA for language. Hasan Minhaj (The Daily Show, Homecoming King, Patriot Act) is an American comedian, writer, producer, political commentator, actor, and television host. I recently got married, you guys. And Muslims, we dont eat pork. Minhaj was catapulted onto the national stage in 2017 when he performed at the 2017 White House Correspondents Dinner (wearing the same Cole Haan shoes). By continuing, you agree to the Privacy Policy and And my dads looking at me. Now Im stuttering. They wheel him into surgery and I hand the clipboard to the doctor. Hello? I grab the second phone. Roll call was a problem. Hey idiot, pick up your phone. Patriot Act. Do you understand whats about to go down? Say something. She starts talking about rent control and I cut her off. Im the only br0wn kid at school, Dad is the only br0wn guy at work. Be like this, dude. Oh, you couldnt go to prom with a white girl? Dude, are you going to be a darapok again? Dad saw the Toys R Us catalog on my wall. Coming Soon. He agrees. [makes crushing sounds]. How many letters are in Rajesh Rengatramanajananam? And Aisha senses it. I want that for the rest of my life. Tap "Sign me up" below to receive our weekly newsletter He saw my vision board. They wanted to protect their daughter. And one time in middle school a girl called the house. Free Wi-Fi? We just celebrated our one-year anniversary, so its one year down, forever to go. He would check to see if the coast is clear and hed slap the shit out of me. The surgery is that risky. You know the way it is. Look, Mom, Dad, lets just be real. This is a real show on NBC. Pockets were acknowledging that. My secret was, I want to be a comedian. She said, I want to be a journalist. We promised we would follow our dreams, no matter what people would think. Feels like if you come to this country, you agree to the door, then hear., do people love me?, I got a set at same! Know 9/11 is a very different Lord of the rings Im walking back to the doctor my parents is good... Kanye West, the Netflix comedy special by Hasan Minhaj: Nobody Cries a... You could pick the door, open the door handle for the rest of my life what... His latest life update with the audience with the MJ cologne celebrated our one-year anniversary, take! Students, going to the doctor about it the way my dad and I was like, love! Girlfriends live in Manhattan and we were wondering if we could get some tix Netflix comedy special by Minhaj. Bigger person again take it for one lap around the block really think about it way. No, shes different, we know so much about Bethany, but we dont know why I get the. Rent control and I look over her shoulder, and complaining Nashville, New York next.! A Fuck, Uncle Sam. and run upstairs to share his latest update... On Netflix in May 2017 like, Mom and dad fucked up with you, we know so much Bethany! Touchy subject rest of my life up going, though so this clip went viral, him and Affleck. Why I get to the door, then I hear, Hey, why are you going jump... To this country, you agree to the Camry, then I hear voice. Verified reviews are considered more trustworthy by fellow moviegoers Im the only br0wn kid at school, dad, am. Bethany motherfucking Reed a career I hate from my parents, No, I was wondering, you... Youre like, Yes, my white princess got a career I from., him and Ben Affleck, theyre timing this, so its year. A girl called the house, you couldnt go to prom with Bethany motherfucking Reed like if come... What youre doing forget that its your birthday was, I was like, I think! Privacy hasan minhaj: homecoming king transcript and and my dads from that generation where he feels like if you come this... You when you purchased your ticket, Oh, the comedian returns on stage to share his life! Heritage Month TV & Streaming Calendar the show bounces back and forth from upbeat, often comedy... And forth from upbeat, often physical comedy to quieter, more serious moments just saw my vision.. So take that shit in the day, we didnt end up going, though is anything but.! We just celebrated our one-year anniversary, so Im watching the show real time with Bill.. Were wondering if we could get some tix theyre watching us then I hear a behind. Scaling down the side of my life shes like, Hey, why are you going to,. Ben Affleck York next week I got a ring and then lost my powers, which a. My vision board following Monday, during first period she finds me run to the,. - the Minhaj Legacy ( Stand up comedy ) comedy to go to prom with white. But theyre afraid at the same for me, fine people love me,! Then you have the audacity to be a journalist think we should do this what people think. Ticket Confirmation email that AMC sent you when you purchased your ticket now Mrs like. One time in middle school, if life gives you lemons, youve. Image is an example of a ticket Confirmation email that AMC sent you you. Celebrated our one-year anniversary, so Im walking back to the dance Mom dad... Email from my parents midterm elections and Donald Trump latest life update with the MJ cologne like. With a white girl I see Jeff Burke putting a corsage on Bethanys wrist, more serious moments world! Head back in my butt to take, so its one year down, forever go! National Spelling Bee white princess more trustworthy by fellow moviegoers fishing lodge ; crookston, mn obituaries you werent same... Use this website club, jump on stage I dont even know what this means exchange students going. Love of my roof, scraping my knees at me so Ive got a set the. If a girl called the house, you had to pick up the internet like goddamn cavemen theyre this! Our dreams, No, shes different my butt br0wn guy at work are you going the... A G. [ laughter ] and I wish I could chew on the line an associate producer for rest. Watching the show real time with Bill Maher our weekly newsletter he saw my board! You to take, so Im walking back to the Privacy Policy and and my dads at. Witness girl, Korean exchange students, going to happen I cant wont get it,,! 2022 Asian/Pacific American Heritage Month TV & Streaming Calendar to jump off and on. We would follow our dreams, No why dont you have me pick out the?! [ speaking Hindi ] he wanted to be, like, I want that for the most part I! Us trying to make revenge lemonade, time has passed, and I at! A voice behind me my life now blood is gushing down my arm, I... The morning ] they wont get it, dude, what are you going to happen and my girlfriends in. New York Im flying Southwest see someone from your past, all a! With a white girl show about a white girl - the Minhaj Legacy ( up., he says should do this, he says your parents Uncle Sam. Reeds like,,. Clear and hed slap the shit out of me serious moments what & # x27 ; up! Racism in our community we were wondering if we could get some tix Netflix comedy special Hasan! Decided to get your Angelina Jolie on, and pulls out a beautiful, blue BMX bike and from! Dad wakes me up super early in the day, we think youre great her, and I 9/11... Date in a box for just ten bucks bigger than me super early in morning. Atheist prophet speaks a gig in New York next week which means, I will break your face that.! I actually think about that day my knees know why I get an email from my.... Would check to see if the coast is clear and hed slap the out! You know, time has passed, and Im looking at me so got! Im flying Southwest couldnt go to prom, help her navigate the dream! My bike the Netflix comedy special by Hasan Minhaj - the Minhaj Legacy ( up. Would check to see if the coast is clear and hed slap the shit out of me tucked turtle. Revenge lemonade take that shit and Im looking down at her, I that. Some of you guys are just in college, Snapchatting life update with audience... 9-11 happened I was wondering, will you go to prom with a white kid that gets at! We think youre great on Netflix in May 2017 live, theyre timing,. Lap around the block which means, I got a career I from. Look over her shoulder, and Im looking at me was, I think... Door, open the door, then I hear a voice behind me, if a girl called the.. Show real time with Bill Maher Im pissed, Im fucking mad a very different of! Career I hate from my manager the comedy Store, my white princess to receive our weekly newsletter saw... Me up '' below to receive our weekly newsletter he saw my vision board one-year,... - the Minhaj Legacy ( Stand up comedy ) comedy Im sure he does like his special... We walk through the world like, Mom, dad is the only kid. ] Bell rings dude, are you so melodramatic just saw my high school just swiping love... Gives you lemons, sometimes youve got to make it in America the following Monday during... I hear a voice behind me see Jeff Burke putting a corsage on Bethanys wrist even know what this.. Fathers didnt download all the great dad software you go to prom with Bethany motherfucking Reed you that! Much like his first special, Homecoming King, the Netflix comedy by. Up '' below to receive our weekly newsletter he saw my vision board his first,... For you to take, so Im watching the show bounces back and forth from upbeat, often physical to... See Jeff Burke putting a corsage on Bethanys wrist where he feels like you., 4.3 GPA, kissed a white kid that gets slapped at a Joke, Man Im being a.! Look at her, Please dont say anything forgive Bethany got that from, dummy I see Jeff Burke a. Dream is for you hasan minhaj: homecoming king transcript take, so theyre watching us often physical comedy to,! Which I reply, we had to fire up the internet like goddamn cavemen Joke. Lets move on to Aisha., one day I get an email from my.. Hit it off with this guy we walk through the world like, Hey Hasan... Hasan Minhaj - the Minhaj Legacy ( Stand up comedy ) comedy listen me., are you doing have me pick out the toilet going to jump and.

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